Polls

Yorkshire

I really like my new blog template. As with thekingpin68 blog, the design is standard, but I create my own original colour schemes with HTML code. As one can reason, I like white and dark colours. The previous blog design was good, but I did not like the wideness of the text and preferred the narrow look of thekingpin68. Over time, I have looked at some other colours with thekingpin68 template for satire and theology, but nothing looked that good in my opinion, and so I eventually went with the present template.

The following is a bit silly, but what the heck this is a satire blog. This blog has reached an 'incredible' milestone. Since this blog started in September 2006, a Google search of "Satire and Theology" would always leave this blog behind, usually well behind, information on the book The Devil and Doctor Dwight: Satire and Theology in the Early American Republic. Well today on Google, I am finally the first website on the list after a search, I am presently 1 and 2. Do not worry, I know I am a blog small fry!;)

http://www.misterpoll.com/

The website above offers some interesting polls and I will examine three of these. I voted and shall add commentary. These polls are somewhat like my PhD questionnaire work, although my surveys are more complex. I corrected spelling errors that I found with these polls, and there were quite a few.

Faith and Religion

Results

What is your faith or religion?

Christian (Protestant) (25%)

Atheist (20%)

Catholic (16%)

Other (16%)

Eastern Orthodox (3%)

Islam (3%)

Judaism (3%)

Hindu (3%)

Buddhist (3%)

Jehovah's Witness (1%)

Satanist (1%)

Mormon (0%)

59 total votes

Protestant Christian leads the list, but my sceptical side wonders how many of these persons are primarily cultural as opposed to Biblical Christians.

What do you believe about the Holy Bible?

It is God's Word and has no error (50%)

It is a collection of mythical stories (38%)

It is good, but is not divine (10%)

57 total votes

I accept that the original inspired autographs were without theological error, but copying mistakes have been made. There is also the issue of textual addition and subtraction. These problems do not alter key Biblical doctrines, somewhat due to the large amount of copies from different geographical areas. In the archives, I wrote an article called New Testament Manuscripts which discusses my philosophy on this topic. I do not claim to be a linguist or manuscript expert.

Do you believe in the Big Bang?

Yes, but if it is true, God made it happen (33%)

I'm not sure what I believe (24%)

No, it is a dumb idea (22%)

Yes, it just happened out of nowhere (21%)

54 total votes

I am not a scientist, but I am open-minded concerning the Big Bang theory. This is a NASA article I used with The First Cause argument on thekingpin68 blog.

The Question
(Submitted November 08, 1997)

What is the big bang theory? What do you believe?

The Answer

The big bang theory is the theory that the universe started from a single point, and has been expanding ever since.

This has been well-established by observations, such as the apparent movement of galaxies away from us, and the cosmic microwave background radiation believed to be the leftover light from the big bang.

The evidence for a big bang having taken place about 15 to 20 billion years ago is overwhelming, so I naturally believe that it is the case.

However, if your real question is "why did the big bang happen in the first place?" then that ceases to be an astronomical question, but a religious one.

Some astronomers, who are religious, argue that the big bang theory confirms the existence of God and the basic elements of the creation story as told in the Bible. First came light, then the heavens, then the Earth ...

However, many other scientists do not. Scientists, like people in most any profession, have a vast diversity of religious beliefs. Some of us attend houses of worship, others do not. Some of us consider ourselves very religious, others consider ourselves staunch atheists. Just because we study astronomy does not mean we have any more agreement as to the “why'' questions than anyone else.

On the other hand, it is safe to say that as scientists we can agree on an approach to learning about nature and the universe. This approach is one of using observations to test theories. And when a theory has been tested as much as the big bang theory, with each test reconfirming its validity, then we believe that it likely true -- at least more true than those theories which have failed the observational tests.

Good luck on your quest for the truth.

Jonathan Keohane for Ask an Astrophysicist

How do you believe the world will end?

God will do it however he has planned (56%)

The sun will explode (33%)

The universe will shrink up into nothing (5%)

The world will never end, we will evolve forever (6%)

57 total votes

I reason based on the Book of Revelation (Chapters 21-22) that God will establish a new heaven and new earth. I hope to learn more on this book over the next several years, and it should be stated that the book of Revelation needs to be interpreted with varying degrees of literalness. Mounce (1990: 369). The book uses figurative language in many places, but there shall be a new order of things with the earth and creation. Mounce (1990: 369).

How do you get to heaven and don't be damned to hell forever?

through faith in Jesus Christ as your Savior (41%)

there is no heaven or hell (34%)

you just do good things and hope you get there (17%)

you fly planes into buildings and kill people (6%)

you sacrifice animals so God will say OK (0%)

58 total votes

I chose the first option and reason that a person that is regenerated by the creator to believe and trust in Jesus Christ and God from the Bible is saved. The grammar with this question is poor, of course.

Dating Non-Christians

Is it acceptable for a professed Christian to date a professed non Christian?

Results

Is it acceptable for someone who desires to live their lives in pursuit of Christ to enter into a dating relationship with someone who does not profess a belief in God?

Yes it is acceptable but only if the other is open minded and they discuss mutual respect and work out problems early (32%)

No, it is not acceptable because it will weaken your faith rather than strengthen it because partners should be equally yoked. (24%)

No, it is not acceptable because it is impossible to truly love outside of Christ (11%)

No, it is not acceptable because it will only cause problems later (Children, chastity, marriage) (11%)

Yes, it is desirable to bring others to Christ (9%)

No opinion (6%)

Yes, it is acceptable if they are personally strong in their faith (3%)

277 total votes

These results do not surprise me. Please see my three part, A philosophy of singleness series on thekingpin68 blog. It seems difficult for the Church to influence many Christians in today's Western society to think primarily Christian, and not mainly secular in regard to dating and romantic relationships.

For fun:

Results

Which sport is the better one?

soccer (31%)

football (27%)

baseball (20%)

other (13%)

hockey (6%)

basketball (0%)

29 total votes

There is no such thing as a best sport! But I would vote for soccer as my favourite sport to watch, European professional soccer anyway.

MOUNCE, ROBERT H. (1990) The Book of Revelation, Grand Rapids, William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company.

Mcapnea?

Wales

1. I have completed my statistical chapter for my PhD and shall email it to Wales soon. I reason that it is sufficient, but my advisor will let me know how many revisions need to be completed.

2. I also reason that I am vindicated once again in regard to my sleep apnea. On Friday, my waist was measured for a tuxedo in regard to Cousin Buff's wedding, as I am one of the groomsmen. In 2004, I was the best man at Documentary Man's England wedding/blessing and was measured for a Morning Suit. Since then I have lost six inches around the waist. I have always been a fairly small eater, and eat fruits and vegetables, and not a lot of junk food. I exercise roughly one hour a day, six days a week. I have never gone through an extended period in my life where I have not exercised with both cardio and muscle related exercise. But, at one point for a few years, I had three stage sleep apnea. Since 2006, I have had two major surgeries, and am left with one stage sleep apnea. Besides losing six inches around the waist, I have lost 15-20 pounds. It was, and still is very irritating to listen to sometimes well meaning, but ignorant people state that I must be eating too much at McDonald's (which I do not)! Prior to my surgeries I had one sleep apnea specialist insist that I must overeat to be so large and that sleep apnea was not the primary cause of my bulkiness, but unfortunately many of our medical doctors are ignorant in far too many areas. This specialist stated that the starving children in the third world are skinny and therefore, I would be skinny and not fat, if I did not eat too much. Out of respect I did not argue, but I was thinking that this doctor was a poor philosopher. My bulkiness merely means that I eat too much to be thin like a third world child, but does not mean that I eat enough to be fat, and that my bulkiness is caused by overeating! After that meeting with the doctor, my Mom and I went through and examined my daily diet and found I consumed 1500-2000 calories a day, and roughly 2500 a day is the UK male average. The surgeon that performed my throat and nasal sleep apnea surgeries told me that the medical profession has just started learning a sufficient amount about sleep apnea the last few years and in the media I keep hearing that overeaters can develop sleep apnea. It is also possible that persons born with problems can develop sleep apnea and become heavier than they should be, even with a healthy diet and plenty of exercise. Please see the link below.

http://www.weightlossresources.co.uk/logout/calorie_intake.htm


McDonalds vs. Burger King!

http://www.misterkitty.org/extras/stupidcovers/stupidcomics42.html

3. I have just received another 'quality' scammer email that can be used for satirical purposes.

ANDALUCIA & ASSOCIATES

Dear Friend,

I am Barrister Prince Adam the attorney to Mrs Suha Arafat the wife of Yasser Arafat the Palestinian leader who died in Paris.

Since his death my clients Mrs Arafat have been subjected to physical and psychological torture by the present leadership of the Palestinian Liberation Organization and the new Prime Minister. As a widow she is so traumatized she has lost confidence with everybody in her country at the moment.

You must have heard over the media reports and the Internet on the discovery of some funds in her husband secret bank account and companies and the allegations of some huge sums of money deposited by her husband in her name of which she have refuses to disclose or give up to the corrupt Palestine Government.

And they are not relenting on their effort to confiscate the money and make her poor for life as you know the Moslem community has no regards for woman hence her desire for a foreign assistance.

She has in her possession documents for the deposited of the sum of 20 million dollars with a security firm abroad in her name.

It is on this note that she have asked me to look for a very good trustworthy and God fearing person to help her receive this fund into his or her account while she come to join the person and start a new life all over.

I am based in spain right now. I shall be grateful if you could receive this fund into your bank account for safe keeping and any Investment opportunity; this arrangement is known to you me and my client Mrs Arafat.

In view of the above if you are willing to assist for our mutual benefits we will have to negotiate on your percentage share of the $20million that will be kept in your position for a while and invested in your name for her trust pending when her daughter Zahwa will come off age and take full responsibility of her family estate/inheritance.

If you are interested to help complete this transaction then let me hear from you on time because of the urgency of the situation.

You are to reach me on my contact information stated below giving your full names and your direct telephone numbers for me to contact you for us to proceed immediately.

Please expedite action is needed.

Regards.
Barr Prince Adam (esq.)

I thought I would look up Prince Adam on the web, and this is what I came up with.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince_Adam

Prince Adam is a fictional character in the Masters of the Universe franchise. His secret identity is He-Man the main character in the franchise.

Blogger assistance

When I first viewed this image on the web, I thought of my friend Chucky. I also reasoned on how useful such a silly invention could be for those of us that both have blogs and comment on blogs. For Chucky, this would allow him to perform his software engineering work while exercising and walking in the park, hiking, or while in Vancouver looking for a jazz show. It would allow me to post and edit articles while going for my hour long walks. Imagine writing, posting and editing blog articles, burning calories and building muscle mass all at the same time...ingenious!;) In the case of Chuck and I, we could play our innovative, complex, and yet irritating to many, Rush and Mahavishnu Orchestra bootlegs while walking on public streets. I have not personally sold bootleg recordings, but I suppose this contraption could provide the opportunity. I am thinking now that this contraption needs a freezer in order to sell ice cream and make some extra summer cash.

Okay, I have received two of these goofy emails now, and I thought I would share the second one.

Header

to someone else.

up a creek without

Hire! What are you up to? Email me at info only. I am female. Don't miss some of my naughty pictures. over and just play. standpoint, which Noted pediatrician and author discretion in relation

From the New American Standard Bible

Proverbs 7:25, discusses the wiles of a harlot:

Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, do not stray into her paths.

Emailing with a woman who is perhaps a scammer and may or not offer something sexual through the web, is not the same as visiting a harlot or loose woman, but a Christian should avoid the temptations of questionable women. I have done so with God's help, but I do not claim moral perfection.

I have received many Site Meter hits for my Facebook Graffiti One article. I find this amusing.

Facebook quotes #1

Bear Lake, Colorado (photo from trekearth.com)

Being positive is only meaningful in the context of being realistic.

In the 1990's, I went to the free 90 minute Tom Vu 'semina' twice for some laughs with friends. On one occasion Tom suggested that one look for a real estate seller who has recently had a heart attack and then make a low ball offer.

After coming home from Britain in 2001, my good friend with the alias Bobby Buff, announced to me that he had the best build of all his friends. In 2006, he officially retired from body-building and is now a weight trainer. The body-building world mourns.


Facebook graffiti and another tribute to Bob Ross...there.

Perhaps for some, there is more money to be made in selling systems and seminars than there is in the actual business for which they are selling systems and seminars.

The quotes below are from:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Vu

"A lot of your friends will tell you, 'Don't come to the seminar. It's a get-rich-quick plan.' Well, tell them, it is a get-rich-quick plan because life is too short to get rich slow."
"Tom Vu says his system is different than other experts'."
"Okay. You've seen me make a lot of money. You've seen my students who are average people make a lot of money. Isn't is about time for you to go out and make a lot of money?"
"There's two kinds of work in America: hard work and smart work. Which one are you doing now?"
"This is not a country club! This is my house!"
"Today I'm gonna show you how to drive a sports car. First, you need a lot of money!"
"Don't listen to your friends. They're losers!"
"Do you think these girls like me? NO, they like my money!"
"At first I got lots of discouragement from friends and stranger who are loser! You know what these people kept telling me? They kept saying, 'Well Tom Vu, you a crazy nut, here you are, a poor immigrant, poor minority, speak no English, no contact, on and on, and you trying to be rich in America! You crazy, man! Look at people out there! They smarter than you are, they not even rich! Who are you to try?' And you know what? I have to keep telling these people every time, I kept saying, 'You are loser! Get out of my way! I make it somehow!'"