NHL Expansion: Manitoba Mennonite Martyrs

Howard James Bartel

30 mins · 

"Bettman also announced plans for teams in Mumbai, Nairobi, Guatemala City, and a Labrador ghost town, all of which are seen to be the perfect fit for the NHL as they are estimated to have similar fan base to the southern US locales he seems to fetishize."

NHL Announces Expansion to Tiny Mennonite Village - The Daily Bonnet

NEUBERGTHAL, MB Commissioner Garry Bettman was in southern Manitoba on Wednesday to announce the expansion of the NHL to Las

DAILYBONNET.COM

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Howard James Bartel Russ Murray

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Russ Murray Cited

'Commissioner Garry Bettman was in southern Manitoba on Wednesday to announce the expansion of the NHL to Las Vegas, Nevada and also to the tiny Mennonite village of Neubergthal, just south of Altona.'

'“We figure they have a similar size fan base of hockey fans. Neubergthal has a population of just under a hundred people and, assuming they’re all hockey fans, means the franchise should outdraw the Las Vegas team by about thirty people per game,” explained Bettman standing in front of the Friesen Barn.'

'Bettman also announced plans for teams in Mumbai, Nairobi, Guatemala City, and a Labrador ghost town, all of which are seen to be the perfect fit for the NHL as they are estimated to have similar fan base to the southern US locales he seems to fetishize.

“Quebec City will never get a team,” explained Bettman. “Too many real hockey fans there.”'

Russ Murray The Mennonite community is an underdeveloped NHL market. I suggest the 'Manitoba Mennonite Martyrs' for a name.

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Howard James Bartel When playing the MMMs, all you need to do is play all your goons...

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