Older friend cracks me up @church: Don't wear pants!
Paraphrased conversation during the social time after the formal part of a mutual friend's memorial service @church.
An older male friend.
(Thoughts/Actions)
Older friend: You look big and intimating in that black suit! You look too serious!
Me: It's a memorial service. What do you suggest I do (smiling)?
Older friend: You will scare all the girls away.
Me: I thought women were supposed to like a protector?
Me: (To a kind older woman listening) Do I intimidate the women here?
Older woman: (Laughs)
Older friend: You need to talk to girls you like.
Me: I have talked to the girls I like. (More precisely, I have talked to the women that I might like)
Older friend: No, no, no, just keep talking with them until they like you. Just keep asking them out for coffee (laughs). Every week!
Me: I have talked with them, no worries. (Harassment is not part of my plans, however)
Older friend: You are way too serious!
Me: Suggestion (smiling)?
Older friend: Wear no pants!
Me: Laughs. I don't think that would work here...
Older friend: No! Wear shorts!
Older friend: They are intimidated by you! Smile and laugh more, like you are now.
Me: Okay, I am laughing...
Older friend: Good, that is what you do!
