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| Paris-Google+European Union |
My corporate security question for 2014...
Who are 'those guy'?
A certain married Eastern European Diva that had been pinched on the side again New Year's Eve for stating I would have to stay in the corner for arriving at their house in my corporate security suit after work, later at a second New Year's party was overheard stating (paraphrased) to her girlfriends:
'Let us go do that (shopping) on Friday instead, but 'wvat' about my earrings?'
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| Google+ |
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| Paris-Goggle+European Union |
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| Surgut, Russia-Beautiful Earth, Google+ |
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| Hong Kong-O Canada.com |
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| Melbourne-Wallpaper.com |
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| London-Wallpaper.com |
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| Ibtimes.co.uk |
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| Dubai-Happy New Year Wishes 2015x.com |
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| Dubai-Happy New Year Wishes 2015x.com |
ReplyDeleteThe preacher came to call the other day. He said at my age I should be thinking of the hereafter.
I told him, "Oh, I do it all the time. No matter where I am - in the bedroom, upstairs, in the kitchen, or down in the basement - I ask myself, 'Now, what am I here after?'"
…..Doc’s Daily Chuckle (pkaine@roadrunner.com) by way of “Christian Voices” (ChristianVoices@att.net)
ReplyDeleteAfter living what I felt was a 'decent' life, my time on earth came to the end.
The first thing I remember is sitting on a bench in the waiting room of what I thought to be a court house.
The doors opened and I was instructed to come in and have a seat by the defense table.
As I looked around I saw the 'prosecutor'.
He was a villainous looking gent who snarled as he stared at me. He definitely was the most evil person I have ever seen.
I sat down and looked to my left and there sat My Attorney, a kind and gentle looking man whose appearance seemed so familiar to me, I felt I knew Him.
The corner door opened and there appeared the Judge in full flowing robes.
He commanded an awesome presence as He moved across the room. I couldn't take my eyes off of Him.
As He took His seat behind the bench, He said, 'Let us begin.'
The prosecutor rose and said, 'My name is Satan and I am here to show you why this man belongs in hell.'
He proceeded to tell of lies that I told, things that I stole, and In the past when I cheated others. Satan told of other horrible perversions that were once in my life, and the more he spoke, the further down in my seat I sank.
I was so embarrassed that I couldn't look at anyone, even my own Attorney, as the Devil told of sins that even I had completely forgotten about.
As upset as I was at Satan for telling all these things about me, I was equally upset at My Attorney who sat there silently not offering any form of defense at all.
I know I had been guilty of those things, but I had done some good in my life - couldn't that at least equal out part of the harm I'd done?
Satan finished with a fury and said, 'This man belongs in hell, he is guilty of all that I have charged and there is not a person who can prove otherwise.'
When it was His turn, My Attorney first asked if He might approach the bench. The Judge allowed this over the strong objection of Satan, and beckoned Him to come forward.
As He got up and started walking, I was able to see Him in His full splendor and majesty.
I realized why He seemed so familiar; this was Jesus representing me, my Lord and my Savior.
He stopped at the bench and softly said to the Judge, 'HI, DAD,' and then He turned to address the court.
'Satan was correct in saying that this man had sinned, I won't deny any of these allegations. And, yes, the wage of sin is death, and this man deserves to be punished.'
Jesus took a deep breath and turned to His Father with outstretched arms and proclaimed, 'However, I died on the cross so that this person might have eternal life and he has accepted Me as his Savior, so he is Mine.'
My Lord continued with, 'His name is written in the Book of Life, and no one can snatch him from Me. Satan still does not understand yet. This man is not to be given justice, but rather mercy.'
As Jesus sat down, He quietly paused, looked at His Father and said, 'There is nothing else that needs to be done. I've done it all..'
The Judge lifted His mighty hand and slammed the gavel down. The following words bellowed from His lips.....
'This man is free. The penalty for him has already been paid in full. Case dismissed.'
I asked Jesus as He gave me my instructions where to go next, 'Have you ever lost a case?'
Christ lovingly smiled and said, 'Everyone that has come to Me and asked Me to represent them has received the same verdict as you, ~Paid In Full.'
If you do not pass this along to 15 people immediately, absolutely nothing will happen.
Passing this on to anyone you consider a friend, (as I have done here), will bless you both.
'Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!
A blonde & her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog.
ReplyDeleteIt has been in the backyard barking for hours & hours.
The blonde jumps up out of bed and says, "I've had enough of this".
She goes downstairs.
The blonde finally comes back up to bed and her husband says, "The dog is still barking, what have you been doing?"
The blonde says,
"I put the dog in our backyard ...
let's see how THEY like it!
Two Blondes With Hammers...
ReplyDeleteLisa & Judy were doing some carpenter work
on a Habitat for Humanity House.
Lisa was nailing down house siding,
would reach into her nail
pouch, pull out a nail & either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in.
Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, 'Why are you throwing those nails away?'
Lisa explained, 'When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end & I throw them away.'
Judy got completely upset & yelled, 'You moron! Those nails aren't defective! They're for the other side of the house!'
Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?
ReplyDeleteThey had gone to see 'Closed for the Winter.'
A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked her.
ReplyDelete'Well, I was trying to commit suicide,' the blonde replied.
'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by
shooting off your finger?'
'No, silly' the blonde said. 'First I put the gun to my chest, &
then I thought, 'I just paid $6, 000.00 for these implants.
I'm not shooting myself in the chest.'
'So then?' asked the doctor.
'Then I put the gun in my mouth, & I thought, 'I just paid $3,000.00
to get my teeth straightened. I'm not shooting myself in the mouth.'
'So then?'
'Then I put the gun to my ear, & I thought:
'This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the trigger.
A blonde was driving home after a game & got caught in a really bad
ReplyDeletehailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it
to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he
decided to have some fun... He told her to go home and blow into the
tail pipe really hard, & all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands & knees & started blowing into her tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, & still nothing happened.
Her blonde roommate saw her & asked, 'What are you doing?' The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
The roommate rolled her eyes & said, 'Uh, like hello!
You need to roll up the windows first.'
A blonde was shopping at Target &
ReplyDeletecame across a shiny silver thermos.
She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up & took it to the clerk to ask what it was.
The clerk said, 'Why, that's a thermos.
I
t keeps hot things hot, And cold things cold.'
'Wow, said the blonde, 'that's amazing.....I'm going to buy it!'
So she bought the thermos & took it to work the next day.
Her boss saw it on her desk.
'What's that,' he asked?
'Why, that's a thermos.... It keeps hot things hot & cold things cold,' she replied..
Her boss inquired, 'What do you have in it?'
The blond replied......
'Two popsicles & some coffee.'
A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.
ReplyDeleteHer boss asked sympathetically, 'What's the matter?'
The blonde replies,
'Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.'
The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, 'Why don't you go home for the day? Take the day off to relax & rest.'
'Thanks, but I'd be better off here.
I need to keep my mind off it &
I have the best chance of doing that here.'
The boss agrees & allows the blonde to work as usual.
A couple of hours pass & the boss decides to check on the blonde.
He looks out from his office & sees the blonde crying hysterically...
'What's so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?' he asks.
'No!' exclaims the blonde.
'I just received a horrible call from my sister. Her mother died, too!'
Blondes Are The Best!!!
“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”
ReplyDelete― Anne Frank
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'cheap, Fake gold wedding,', yes a good Biblical start on a life long relationship...
ReplyDeleteRoast Duck, Egg Nog & Barbies
ReplyDeleteI couldn't refrain from commenting. Very well written! You are
ReplyDeletetalented psychic
I hope to be talented at prayer...
ReplyDeleteI needed to thank you for this good read!! Iabsolutely loved every little bit of it.
ReplyDeleteI have you bookmarked to look at new stuff you post…
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To be so gifted with so little--and we complain. This is another awesome clip.
ReplyDeleteDerek Paravicini... Musical Savant!
Lesley Stahl profiles British musical savant Derek Paravicini, whose computer-like memory for music is matched by his creative abilities to play it in any style.
Derek, a musical genius and nephew of Camilla Parker Bowles, plays the piano like you've never heard.
Yet, he doesn't know his age, nor does he know how to hold up three fingers! Also, he is blind!
CLICK the link below, turn on your sound and be amazed.
http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=Ak2jxmhCH1M&feature=player_embedded
A little boy was asked whether he was excited about the new baby his mother was expecting.
ReplyDelete"Yes!" the 4-year-old said, "and I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call it Christina, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!"
…..Copyright 2014 Mike Atkinson (www.mikeysFunnies.com) by way of “Christian Voices” (ChristianVoices@att.net)
How older guys can stay strong without a gym membership
ReplyDeleteNot considered an older guy, but I do not like stinky gyms, so I workout at home, a lot...
ReplyDeleteSweet blog! I found it while surfing around on Yahoo News.
ReplyDeleteDo you have any suggestions on how to get listed in Yahoo News?
I've been trying for a while but I never seem to get there!
Cheers
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A little boy was asked whether he was excited about the new baby his mother was expecting.
ReplyDelete"Yes!" the 4-year-old said, "and I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call it Christina, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!"
…..Copyright 2014 Mike Atkinson (www.mikeysFunnies.com) by way of “Christian Voices” (ChristianVoices@att.net)
You are doing a good job dear.
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Thanks